Pumpkins, football, crunchy leaves...these are a few of my favorite things

Summer 2010, FAIL. It is the offical first day of school for kids in Oregon and boy did the rain welcome the students back! September is usually a warm and very pleasent month in Portland, I'm usually ready for the warm weather to be over by this time, however this years' summer was lame. A few hot days, a few more warmer days and the rest was crap.

As I grieve the loss of the summer I never had, not just the weather, but you know all those things that I didn't do. All those camping trips I didn't take, all those late nights with friends that didn't happen, and all those days NOT spend by the river. I can't help but welcome in the next season. Fall, my favorite by far. There is just so much excitment with this season. It is the begining of a long stretch of holidays with family and friends, college and NFL football, cold and windy clear days, the trees changing colors, the first sighting of seeing your breath in the morning. Fall in the Northwest is beautiful, all too short, but beautiful.

I'm looking forward to this season, for no particular reason. God has got me in the midist of a period of waiting. I'm not sure what for, if it would have been up to me, I would be halfway done with grad school, have traveled a little, and working at a sweet job. Instead, I'm no closer to going to school than I was five years ago. I haven't gone anywhere and I live in the town I went to high school in. I've come to learn that there is either a sense of unrest in waiting or a sense of peace. I've felt restless for awhile, though, I feel I'm turning the corner into peace. I'm not there yet, I still get anxious to 'get things going'. However, I'm making progress in other areas. I'm building relationships with my friends and family, building connections with the community that raised me, and growing in character- a rather painstaking process, I'm learning.

I went to a forum at my church months ago, about waiting. This topic often comes up in my blog, because it is often on my mind. I'm in that stage of life where things are 'supposed' to be moving fast and change quickly. I think I'm on more of a stroll than those around me. In this forum, they talked about waiting in many different terms. For women, waiting often comes in waiting for 'the' guy or waiting for children. As a woman, I resonated with that. But, the bigger picture, what are we, we as in humans, waiting for? That is what hit closer to home. What really struck me was that I'll always be waiting. In some form or another in this life, and ultimatly I'm waiting to be reunited with God in the absense of sin after this life. Man, that sounds good. Way better than grad school, a career, a house or a husband. Don't get me wrong, I'm still excited for all those things, but realizing they aren't the only thing really helps knock that anxiety down a couple of notches. Perspective, something I try (and often fail at) teaching the kids at work.

In the meantime, I'll take my three jobs, friends and family, the funny thing a kid says or a crazy thing a co-worker does; slow down and realize life should be lived in the moment. So, for the time being I'm excited to sip my pumpkin spice latte, go out of my way to step on that slightly crunchy leaf, paddle the river with a friend and have the wind blow in my face, carve a pumpkin and bake the seeds, and watch a football game in my fleece-onesey-PJ's eating junk food. Hey, maybe I'll marry one of those football players...or not.