The longing for the life that we don't possess and cannot gain from this world will remain until we find fulfillment in the King himself."- Rick McKinley, from A Kingdom Called Desire
I like what McKinley says in the above quote (well, and the whole book) because it really speaks to the tension that we live in. More specifically, at church recently, we've been focusing on some of these tensions and the tensions within the church.
There seems to be this tension between Evangelist and the 'social action' camp, well between neo-liberals and neo-fundamentalist. "Which camp is Jesus in? That's the question. Because everyone is claiming he is one their side. But Jesus isn't in one camp or another; he is at work in the tension of holding together the proclamation of the gospel embodied in a people who lovingly serve the world. The choice is not either evangelisim or social action but both/and."
In my home community last week we had a candid and honest conversation about a feeling someone in the group had...and come to find out, many others also shared in. That as a church, our church specifically, we felt this focus on serving in an outreach capacity and not so much on loving each other. Maybe a 'Portland' culture thing? We didn't spend a whole lot of time on analyzing how, why or where, or place blame on anyone or anything.
We decided that as a home community, to not only focus on outreach of the marginalized, but to be intentional in loving each other- to be authentic. In my opinion, it was encouraging. Not to say that it will be easy, because to be intentional and authentic you have to be willing to open up your own life. To let people in, and that can be hard.
In recent years, I've discovered that I tend to hold most of my relationships at a little bit of a distance (maybe more of a gaping distance in some instances). There are a few, that I think I do let in. And I think a lot of people are like that especially in the culture we live in. Don't want to get too close, you might get hurt or offend someone. But how can we live wholeheartedly and intentionally love others if we aren't willing to let them in?
It is a two way road and you can't have one without the other. You have to receive and overflow with love in order to give it. However, that is a lot of work and it requires, demands even, vulnerability. You have to let other in to call you out on things, to speak and walk with you in truth AND grace.
I think the grace part is easy sometimes, at least easy to receive it. Also easy to give it sometimes. I also think we mask a lot of our giving of grace as silent judging, or maybe that is just me.
It is clearly not my job or anyone elses to judge another, because I am a sinner and you are a sinner. We are both guilty. I am sure glad that it isn't my job, although I sometimes struggle with thinking it is. God is the only one that can do that job, however that doesn't stop us from trying. He is full of grace and is just. Can you imagine if he did judge us like we judge others? We'd all be screwed. Thankfully, he is full of grace and mercy and sent Jesus and that he conquered the grave.
Here is an excerpt from McKinley's book that I think is more clear than I could ever be.
"We leave the polarizing place of choosing between church or culture when Jesus becomes the object of our desire. We have to. To desire Jesus is to live into his reign and display his love to the world whereever he calls us, whether that be church or the board room, the home or the streets, the neighborhood or the mission field. To do justice and love mercy in its fullest sense is most authentic and Christ honoring when we have received mercy and been justified by a gracious King."
So, if Jesus is in everything, and the Spirit is in me then all I need to do is live into him and his truth and grace. That is going to be the greatest adventure.
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